There are so many things I can say right now. So many things. The world feels like it is in upheaval. In Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand talks about the producers of the world shrugging, just letting go of the weight of all that they carry. It kind of feels like the planet is shrugging. It’s quite the experience, really.

Two weeks ago everything appeared to be operating as normal – my job was happening at home, kids were in school, family had their routines and habits – we even had habits about what to fight over, if you really want to be honest. Then on Thursday things began shutting down for the Coronavirus. I’m honestly not sure what triggered the chaos, but Thursday morning, March 12, everything was fine and by the afternoon madness reigned supreme.

I tell you, it is still one of the strangest things I have ever experienced. All of a sudden people are worried about toilet paper and having enough groceries to last a month or two in case of lock downs; chaos had a field day, I tell you. An absolute field day!

Four days in, school is cancelled. I figured it was coming so I’d already decided to keep my kids home regardless of what the ‘authorities’ decided. That wasn’t really a shock. What was a shock was the fact that you really couldn’t find toilet paper! Who are these people that have stockpiles of it somewhere?

It’s still the weirdest thing to me. I even went out at 5:00 in the morning hoping to get some, but that was an abysmal failure. Lucky for me, Michelle and I were both able to find some Wednesday morning (the 18th) so we won’t be using homemade rags. Still, it took three days before we were successful.

To be perfectly frank and honest, this entire experience has opened up a slew of fears from my childhood. I was taught or heard in a million different circles my entire life that the world would end in but before it did there would be death, chaos, and destruction. I also read or heard somewhere that there would be plagues and infectious diseases that killed half the population and so on and so forth. Suffice it to say, my 6 year old self was really wanting to dive into a corner and stay there until the madness was over. Thank the Lord for my mother, who is certified in the emotion and body code. She helped me uncover a lot of what was showing up and let it go. Good thing!

So then we fast forward to Wednesday and lo and behold, we’re shaken out of bed (literally) with the biggest earthquake we’ve had in my neck of the woods in thirty or so years. Ummm…..Yeah. We didn’t do much school on Wednesday. We earthquake prepped. Honestly, I’m still earthquake prepping. Emergency kits, anyone?

Anyway, I think it’s safe to say it’s been one helluva week.


*originally written March 24, 2020

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